Oznaka: oh my god

itheasexual:

arcresources:

iamagreenturtle:

mrprincesshorse:

therainbowgorilla:

alexianfireflies:

therainbowgorilla:

nextstepcake:

“Ace Hardware: No screwing, just lots of screws.”

“Ace Hardware: Nail your roof, not your partner.”

“Ace Hardware: For when it really is just a hammer in your pocket”

One of my friends wanted to see a photomanip of the ace hardware logo in ace flag colors, and then I thought of these terrible puns, so here you go.

At first I wasn’t going to reblog this but then I saw it again and just started laughing

my two favorite things: asexuality, and puns

and those puns are literally the best

I NEED more asexual puns

those are indeed the best

“Ace Hardware: Lube for your motor, not your junk”

“Ace Hardware: Erecting buildings, not your penis”

“Ace Hardware: Where nuts aren’t genetalia”

“Ace Hardware: The hammer is not our penis. Its just a hammer.”

“Ace Hardware: Where muff, is short for muffler”

“Ace Hardware: Yes that is a hammer, but we’re still happy to see you.”

“Ace Hardware: You can get Off™ in our repellent aisle”

non sex jokes. 

“Ace Hardware: Hoes are for the garden.”

Source: nextstepcake

sirfrogsworth:

I just read an article about Washington state trying to pass a ban on gay conversion therapy. They have come to their senses and realized you can’t pray away the gay. 

An interesting thing happened in the comments though. I saw a ton of conservatives praising this ban. They were thanking god and everything. I couldn’t figure out what was going on. 

Then I saw a comment that said, “Thank the Lord! You’re either born a boy or a girl. You can’t change that with surgery!”

I thought about this for a moment. Then I laughed a giant belly laugh. These idiots thought conversion therapy was gender reassignment. There were like a hundred of these comments. I have not seen this kind of collective stupidity since Trump was elected. 

I think this might be a new strategy for progressive policies. Maybe we can just use wording that confuses alt-right morons and they will support and vote for them. 

I propose the “Gun Are Great!” Act. We will take your old stinky guns and replace them with great new ones!

*new guns will be airsoft but this will be in size 1 font at the bottom of the legislation